#SpyWhoDumpedMe and #TheDarkestMinds – Movie Reviews

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The Spy Who Dumped Me – Review

The Spy Who Dumped Me – Budget of $40 million – 1 hour and 57 minutes

The Spy Who Dumped Me

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Audrey has 2 highlights in her life.  Her best friend Morgan and her favorite arcade game.  She looks to both of them because her boyfriend Drew broke up with her in a text message.  And to make matters worse, he won’t text back to get his stuff.  So, Morgan grabs her phone and text Drew.  She texts him that she will be setting is stuff ablaze.  Drew calls Audrey back and begs her to stop burning his things.  While at work, Audrey is approached by Sebastian, who asks her to walk him to his car.  She agrees to be nice but he pushes her into a van.  They explain that Drew is CIA and they need her help to find him.  She promises to keep in touch and gets out of the van.   The next day, Morgan is having fun with her latest conquest and Audrey is getting ready for work when Drew comes through their window.  He tells Audrey to hold on to his trophy.  And if he doesn’t make it, she must meet Verne in Cafe S in Vienna at 11 am tomorrow and give Verne is 2nd place fantasy football trophy.  If she doesn’t do it, a lot of people will die.  Seconds later, Drew is killed.  With a slight nudge, Morgan convinces Audrey to keep her promise and finish Drew’s mission.

With an out-of-the-world plot, this movie is funnier and more action pack than the trailer would allow you to believe.  And no, you haven’t seen the best parts in the trailers.  This will make you laugh out loud and cringe.  Also, you will do both at the same time.  It provides a lot of intricate twist in the plot but it isn’t anything new.  You can see the big reveal coming.  The biggest joy of this movie is seeing the two main characters ab-lib the funniest dialogue.  They constantly feeding off each other, upping the ante each time.  While it does have a love story, the sisterhood story between Audrey and Morgan is much stronger.  See this one matinee and bring your best friend.

I give it 3 out of 5 stars

I’m normal – Audrey

I have so much respect for you that it full circled to objectifying – Morgan

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The Darkest Minds – Review

The Darkest Minds – Budget of $34 million – 1 hour and 45 minutes


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On a typical school day, Ruby sat with her friends at lunch, laughed, and talked.  Then, her friend dropped dead in front of her.  By the end of the month, half of her class was dead.  Soon, 98% of the children in the US would die of IAAN (Idiopathic Adolescent Acute Neurodegeneration).  The remaining children would be left with powers.  The government has asked all the parents to turn their children over to be cured.  President Gray was able to cure his son, so he believes all the children can be cured.  Ruby knows her parents are worried about her being taken away.  So, on her birthday night, she tiptoes into their bedroom and promises she won’t let anyone else take her away from them.  When she touches her mother’s arm, she gets the first sense of her powers by erasing her parent’s memory of her.  The next morning Ruby’s mother doesn’t recognize her and calls the government to take her.  The government takes her to a concentration camp where the kids are separated by their “Danger Level” color.  Greens are the smartest.  Blues can move objects with their minds.  Golds can control electricity.  These are the safest colors.  Oranges and Reds are the most dangerous and should be killed on sight.  Ruby takes the test and she is an orange.  But before she can be killed, she touches the doctor and changes his mind.  The doctor makes her diagnosis a Green.  This camp will be her home for the next 6 years.  Until Ruby is discovered as an Orange and must escape.  With the help of Dr. Cate Connor, Ruby gets out of the camp.  However, when Cate makes a stop to meet up with her partner Rob with the Children’s League, Ruby gets a bad vibe from touching him and runs off.  She hides in Liam (Blue) and Chubs (Green) van with the help of Zu (Gold).  They are looking for a rumored oasis for kids like them.  They believe they will finally be safe there.

Based on The Darkest Minds series by Alexandra Bracken, this movie is The Fifth Wave meets X-Men (FTC Affiliate Disclaimer).  With bounty hunters, doctors, and even their parents turning on them, it’s hard to understand who to trust.  Now fans of the book series, understand this movie won’t fall in line perfectly but it’s still a good movie.  This movie ends on a cliffhanger because it’s the set up for the next movie.   So don’t be surprised if you feel like the movie didn’t have a true ending.  While the major plotline and the subplot aren’t original, it provides some laughs and heartfelt moments.  This is a great matinee for teens over the summer.  However, everyone else can wait for Redbox.

I give it 2.5 out of 5 stars

I kinda like myself the way I am – Ruby

What did I tell you about picking up strays – Liam

It’s Charles to you – Chubs

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#AtomicBlonde, #SpiderManHomecoming, and more – Movie Reviews

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Atomic Blonde – Review

Atomic Blonde – Budget of $30 million – 1 hour and 55 minutes

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Atomic Blonde
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Ten days before the Berlin Wall falls, Lorraine is given her mission. The night before an agent named James was killed and a watch containing a list was taken from him.  She must find the list (on microfilm) which contains the name of all the current spies in the field. It must be recovered soon because one spy is listed as a double agent. They need the list to save every operative in the field and to stop the double agent. Her point of contact in Berlin is David.  But Lorraine is worried because the moment she lands in Berlin, she is made by the KGB and must fight.  She is quickly discovered by David who gives her the 10 cent tour of Berlin.  David is quick to exchange anything for information.  Now Lorraine recalls the events of the past 10 days with her boss in an interrogation room.  By the end, her story will include a man with a photographic memory, a beautiful French operative, an ice pick, and a corkscrew.

Based on The Coldest City by Anthony Johnston, this thrill ride starts at the very beginning (FTC Affiliate Disclaimer).  It has the right dose of kick-butt action with dashes of humor when needed.  As Lorraine discusses not having the right outfit before a battle or comment on her contact’s balls, it makes for an easy laugh in tense situations.  Some of the fight scenes are a spectacle to see because everything is a weapon.  There is a not sweeping shot of the fight scenes, just up close and personal.  This is purposely done to make the audience feeling each punch, kick, stab, and gunshot.  Also, the hand to hand combat makes things seem more realistic.  This is a fun watch for any action fan.  Be warned that all of Lorraine’s fights are in the trailer but not at full scale.  Are the best parts of the fight scenes in the trailer? NO.  However, you will anticipate them as the scenes play out.  Anyone younger than 16 should stay home and no need to stay past the credits.  There could be a part two but we must see how this movie pans out with audiences.  See it with the understanding that you may need to see it twice.  It goes fast and there are a lot of twists and turns.

I give it 4 out of 5 stars

Your not the best, are you? – James

Would it make you more comfortable if I stood on the other side of that mirror? It’s a bit crowded back there. – CIA Agent

Money is good. Information is better – David

Sorry. It looked like you needed saving – Delphine

Well, shall we began – Lorraine

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Spider-Man: Homecoming – Review

Spider-Man: Homecoming – Budget of $175 million – 2 hours and 13 minutes

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Spider-Man: Homecoming
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In 2012, The Stark building was highly damaged after the battle with Loki and his drones (FTC Affiliate Disclaimer).  Toomes and his team started the cleanup but are told to pack up and go home by the US Department of Damage Control (DOCD).  Toomes asked them to let him and his crew stay.  He has his business, his family, and his crew’s family all on the line with this contract.  The DODC refuses to hear his pleases and asks him to leave.  Toomes becomes angry because the team is run by Stark Enterprises.  He believes that the big guy is shutting out the little guy.  So, he and his crew keep some of the alien technology to build weapons to sell to criminals.

Last year, Tony Stark saw a promising young hero on YouTube and tracks him down (FTC Affiliate Disclaimer).  He has Happy pick him up and brings him to Berlin as his wildcard in the Avengers’ Civil War.  Peter takes handheld video of the action and can’t contain his excitement.  Once the battle is done, Tony allows Peter to take the suit but he will be monitored by Happy.  He won’t know when his next mission will be but when it comes, Tony will tell him.  A few months later, Peter hasn’t heard from anyone although he reports to Happy every day.  He wants to have more freedom and work with the Avengers on a mission.   While he is being a friendly, neighborhood Spider-Man, he is in high school.  Peter’s friend Ned leaks that Peter is working for the Tony Stark internship program and knows the Avengers, including Spider-Man.  Liz, captain of Peter’s debate team and his crush, has a crush on Spider-Man.  Hearing Ned’s leak, Liz invites them to her party and asks Peter to bring Spider-Man.  At the party, Peter doesn’t want to change into Spider-Man but when the bullying starts, he goes outside to put on his costume.  When he is outside, he sees something blow up and goes to inspect.  There he sees weapons being sold, which he has only seen once before during a bank robbery he stopped.  When he interrupts the deal, everyone runs off.  Just as he catches up, he comes face to face with the Vulture.  After going toe to toe with the vulture, Peter is ready to take off the “training wheels” and go into “kill mode”.

Out of all the Spider-Man movies, this will become a fan favorite (FTC Affiliate Disclaimer).  Don’t worry, you will not have to go through another Peter Park/spider bite/dead uncle backstory.  This movie only mentions the backstory for 5 seconds when Peter explains his powers to his best friend Ned.  The plot centers around Peter coming into his own as a man and his own superhero with the help of Iron Man, Happy, and Ned.  While the 3D visual effects for the Washington Memorial scene will make you dizzy, the computer-generated Spider-Man hasn’t gotten better.  It’s easy to see when the actor is replaced with CGI.  Although, a great aspect of this movie, is it having more than one comic relief.  Michelle, Tony, Happy, and Ned are great comic relief in a time of crisis for Spider-Man.  While most the dialog was fun and strong, the conversation between Liz’s dad and Peter will make your heart beat faster.  For Marvel fans, be sure to look for easter eggs of Stan Lee, Venom, and a potential infinity stone.  If you can stand heights, see this in 3D.  And stay to the very end because your patience is its own reward.  Sit back and enjoy this next installment in the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

I give it 4.5 out of 5 stars

Let’s keep it. The world is changing. It’s time we change too – Toomes

We have thin walls here – Happy

If she finds out people try to kill me every single night, she won’t let me do this anymore – Peter

Seriously, yes, you will not regret this – Mason

I just saved your life. What do you say – Toomes

I’m not obsessed with him. Just observant – Michelle

What the … – May

Man in the chair. Yes – Ned

You say sorry a lot – Liz

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47 Meters Down – Review

47 Meters Down – Budget of $5 million – 1 hour and 25 minutes

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47 Meters Down
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Lisa and Kate are two sisters on an idyllic trip to Mexico.  Lisa asked Kate to come after her boyfriend Stuart backed out.  Later, Lisa reveals that Stuart couldn’t come because he broke up with her for being too boring.  Kate encourages her to be more adventurous and go out for a night on the town.  It’s where they meet Louis and Javier who tell them about cage diving with sharks.  Lisa quickly tells her no, but Kate reminds Lisa that Stuart will see she is not boring when she posts the pictures online.  Lisa relents.  The next morning they get on the boat and Lisa starts to have doubts.  Kate reminds her to be fun and let loose.   Louis and Javier go down first and come back up.  Kate and Lisa go down next.  At first, they are having a great time.  But the wench breaks and the cage falls 47 meters down to the ocean floor (btw 47 meters ≈ 154 feet).  The wench is on top of their cage door, they can’t hear the captain in their mask, their air is running out, oh and they are surrounded by sharks.  No biggie.  Now they have to make it back the surface without being eaten or coming up too fast (which can kill them).  But first, they need to get the cage door open.

You can feel your heart pound and the oxygen slowly sucked out of the room.  As with all thrillers, just as the girls come up with a plan there is a shark, snapped line, blood in the water, and hallucinations.  They have so many warning signs that something bad will happen but continue for the once in a lifetime chance, and making an ex-boyfriend jealous.  This is a must for any dive or shark fan to see on the big screen.  While the twists and turns are foreshadowed and/or predictable, you are still lured into a false hope for the girls’ fate.  See this at the matinee price before it leaves theaters.

I give it 3 out of 5 stars

Just think of the pictures – Kate

I feel super uneasy about this – Lisa

You both know how to scuba dive right? – Captain Taylor

Get back in the cage – Javier

Buenas Noches – Louis

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#TheWrongStudent, #TangledBeforeEverAfter, and more – TV Reviews

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The Wrong Student – Review

The Wrong Student – Lifetime – 2 hours and 2 minutes

The Wrong Student

After her parents died in a car crash, Amber’s life is uprooted and she goes to live with her aunt, Kelly. The divorced, business owner, was not ready to be a mother, but is doing the best she can for Amber. She is supporting Amber’s soccer dreams and even gets to know Coach Dominic. As Kelly and Dominic get closer, Amber and her new friend, Maddie, are annoyed by the relationship. But when Amber is suspected of killing a young friend, Riley, Kelly is in shock. She knows Amber didn’t do it. The cops believe that the killer’s true focus is Coach Dominic or that he could be the killer. The truth will make everyone’s head spin.

This movie starts of creepy and keeps it going. Now, like most Lifetimers, you will be watching the clock for the first body to drop. It takes 40 minutes as characters develop and the crazy cranks up. But it is worth the wait. Yes, you will have to deal with bratty teens and clueless cops, but it’s fun to see the crazy unfold. The killer is not the mystery, the mystery is when will they figure out what’s going on. This movie does require you attention. So sit back, get your wine, and get ready to see some wild stuff.

I give it 4 out of 5 stars

I’m better off not knowing – Amber

You go girl – Kelly

Well unfortunately it looks like we have a lot in common – Maddie

Now, you get back to class and stop causing trouble, or I will suspend you – Coach Hendricks

If I got proof, would you believe me then – Riley

It’s highly inappropriate – Coach Dominic

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Tangled: Before Ever After – Review

Tangled: Before Ever After – Disney Channel – 1 hour and 5 minutes

Tangled: Before Ever After

It’s been 6 months since Rapunzel returned to her parents with the love her life Eugene. She will soon have a coronation to introduce her to the kingdom as it’s princess and future queen. As much as Rapunzel loves becoming princess, she feels a lot of pressure and wants to explore the world outside the castle gates. Her biggest hurdle, her father, King Frederic. He still has bad memories about losing his daughter, and will protect her at any cost. Rapunzel still has bad memoriess about being trapped in the tower, and wants to be free. One night, Rapunzel’s lady in waiting, Cassandra, helps Rapunzel hid from the guards and escape before her coronation. While on their adventure, a magical encounter causes Rapunzel’s hair to go from short and brown to long and blonde … again. Cassandra soon discovers her hair is now cannot be cut. She has to hid her hair from Eugene, her parents, and the coronation guests she will be meeting … in 2 hours. But that is nothing compare to what’s coming … Lady Kane. Lady Kane has been seeking her revenge for years and plans to get it at the coronation. Rapunzel’s life will never be the same.

Although this short movie does not have the animation quality of the original movie, it does create a great framework for the TV Series (FTC Affiliate Disclaimer). It stays true to the original characters and provides an new song kids will be sure to sing. This series will provide the tale of what happen between Rapunzel coming back to her marriage to Eugene … so BEFORE ‘happily’ ever after. It shows the viewers that happily ever after doesn’t happen overnight but overtime. With new characters, like Cassandra (a female Eugene), something new and fun is added to the mix. If the series is anything like this movie, there will be a second season.

I give it 4 out of 5 stars

Busy, but busy’s good – Rapunzel

Time to pay our respects to our lovely royals – Lady Kane

Holy hair – Eugene

What you do when no one is looking, is your business – Cassandra

We’ll discuss that later son, much later – King Frederic

It means “there’s more in you” – Queen Arianna

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A Deadly Affair – Review

A Deadly Affair – LMN – 2 hours and 0 minutes

A Deadly Affair

After a passionate kiss, Mary quickly regrets kissing Trevor. She stops because they are both married, and Susan, Trevor’s wife, is her friend. Mary admits that she is only with Trevor, because she is tipsy and has doubts about her husband, Charlie’s, fidelity. She quickly retreats home only to find that Charlie came home extremely late, forgot their anniversary, and has scratches on his back. Charlie makes up an excuse and they continue with life. The next day Charlie, Mary, Susan, and Trevor have dinner. Mary’s suspicions are only intensifies, but when she gets a call from Charlie with deep breathing, she has to find him. She locates him and finds Charlie dead on the floor with a stab wound in his back. She vows to find his killer, but most of the townspeople are looking at her. Her reputation, family, career, and freedom are all on the line.

A Deadly Affair starts as a slow story of betrayal and leads into a murder mystery. The first 30 minutes are slow and predictable. While the mystery does point to many suspects, including Mary, but stick to your first instincts about the killer and their ‘why’. By doing the expected, the movie is a bit of a let down. The mystery is the best part of the movie, however the beginning and conclusion is ho-hum. If you watch this movie, use the first 30 minutes and the last 30 minutes as background noise. The time in between is a good watch and saves the movie.

I give it 3 out of 5 stars

Everybody makes mistakes – Trevor

I got pissed – Mary

They’ll buy whatever I sell them. I’m persuasive – Susan

I’m just not much of a reader – Charlie

I know what you did. Don’t make me tell – Crystal

I visit charlie today. You should visit him sometime – Mrs. Susan

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