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#AdriftMovie and #HotelArtemis – Movie Reviews

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Table of Reviews

Hotel Artemis – Review

Hotel Artemis – Budget Unknown – 1 hour and 34 minutes

Hotel Artemis
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In 2028, Nurse has run Los Angelos’s Hotel Artemis for 22 years but it’s not a hotel.  The only open floor is the penthouse and its a hospital for criminals.  They must pay monthly dues, bring no guns, have no visitors, do no business, and never bring the police to the hotel.  And Nurse keeps everyone in line with an orderly properly named Everest.  Each room in the penthouse has a name and the patient is only referred to by this name.  The current patients are:

  • Nice: A hitwoman who only goes after important people and has an interesting implant
  • Honolulu: A bank robber with multiple guns shot wounds and a stolen pen
  • Waikiki: A bank robber who tried to get out of life but kept paying his dues
  • Acapulco: An arms dealer with a big mouth and something to prove

But two patients will cause every rule in Hotel Artemis to be broken, leaving a bloodbath.

If you are a fan of John Wick, this is right up your alley.  This movie gives you enough back story on each character to see how they are all interconnected as friends, lovers, and enemies.  It’s hard to understand how this Hotel has stood the test of time.  However, with the rules and security, everything stays in place.  Also, you will get the added bonus of learning the truth about Hotel Artemis’s start by Nurse making a deal with the devil.  Be warned there are some violent moments, so younger children should not attend.  This is going to be a cult classic and it is possible for a part 2.

I give it 4.5 out of 5 stars

I may be a professional but she is the business – Waikiki

Don’t cross my line – Nice

I am not fat – Everest

Get your hands off the Guc – Acapulco

Those things will kill you – Nurse

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Adrift – Review

Adrift – Budget of $35 million – 1 hour and 36 minutes

Adrift
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Grifter Tami Ashcraft just drifted to Tahiti.  She has no job, direction, nor money.  Her plan is always the same.  Find a job, save money, and go to the next place.  While painting a boat, she sees Richard coming ashore.  Their connection is instant and strong.  After a few magical days together, Richard asks her to sail away with him.  She agrees.  But before they can get away, Richard is offered a job.  Sail a man’s yacht to San Diego and earn $10,000 and 2 first class tickets back to Tahiti.  Tami doesn’t want to head to San Diego because it’s home.  She is not ready to go home just yet.  However, out of fear of holding Richard back, she agrees to go.  The first few days are lovely but when a hurricane hits, the loving couple will be tested in faith, strength, and love.

Based on the novel Red Sky in Mourning by Tami Ashcraft and Susea McGearhart, this is the harrowing survival of 41 days adrift supported by true love (FTC Affiliate Disclaimer).  After Richard is injured, he guides Tami into sailing them to safety.  However, when they realize that California is too dangerous, the sail to Hawaii.  For them, it will be like hitting a moving target.  And if they miss, the closes land is Japan.  So with little water, little food, no power, no radio, and injuries, they have to fight to live.

I give it 2.5 out of 5 stars

Did I just ask you to marry me using my dead mother’s voice – Richard

Whatever job pays enough to get to the next place – Tami

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#ReadyPlayerOne and #PacificRimUprising – Movie Reviews

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Ready Player One – Review

Ready Player One – Budget of $175 million – 2 hours and 0 minutes

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Ready Player One
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In Columbus, Ohio 2045, Wade Watts is like every other person in The Stacks. He is living his life in the OASIS (Ontologically Anthropocentric Sensory Immersive Simulation). The only things you can’t do in the OASIS is eat, sleep, and go to the bathroom. Otherwise, you can do anything, be anyone, go anywhere, and spend real money to level up. The downfall is that when people’s avatars die, they lose everything they ever earned in the OASIS. Whether its coin, weapons, armor, or anything else. So when they lose it in the game, they often lose their minds in the real world.  Five years ago, the games creator James Halliday released a recorded announcement triggered by his death.  He left an easter egg in the OASIS.  Whoever finds the easter egg will get half of a trillion dollars and control over the OASIS.  In order to get to the egg, you must find 3 hidden keys.  The keys won’t just be lying around, you have to win games and solve clues to get them.  And finding one key will give you a hint to the others.  But after 5 years, no one has won the 1st race to lead to the first key.  Even the IOI (Innovative Online Industries) with a war room, billions of dollars, and loyalty camps can’t win.  When Wade, under his avatar Parzival, learn the truth about IOI and the loyalty camps, he will do anything to win and save the OASIS.  The only problem is that he won’t “Clan Up”, even with his best friend Aech.  Wade wants to be like Parzival and win the prise on his own.  Can he alone save the OASIS?

Based on the book Ready Player One by Ernest Cline, this movie isn’t just about an Easter Egg (FTC Affiliate Disclaimer). The entire movie is one giant Easter Egg for gamers, movie lovers, and music lovers.  Taking characters from video games like Zelda and Grand Theft Auto, along with characters from movies like Beetlejuice and Child’s Play, and music like Jump and Take on Me, this movie is a feast for the eyes and the ears.  It gives a contemporary political view of the future of the VRE industry without condemning it.   It is funny and very insightful.  You will laugh out loud and consider what the future will hold for this technology.  It’s easy to get lost in the OASIS when the world around you has fallen apart.  The Lost Generation need to OASIS as their permanent escape but it’s affecting their real lives.  So much that they are indebted to the game and put in camps where they work off their debt.  They are forced deeper into debt and become slaves in and out of the game.  This movie should be seen in Dolby for the full visual and audio experience.

I give it 4 out of 5 stars

I just had to make sure – James

She could be a ‘He’ – Aech

I don’t Clan up – Wade

That’s not possible – Ogden

Give me that – Nolan

And you just decided to use that now – Samantha

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Pacific Rim: Uprising – Review

Pacific Rim: Uprising – Budget of $176 million – 1 hour and 51 minutes

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Pacific Rim: Uprising
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Jake, the son of Stacker Pentecost, is nothing like his father. He steals and barters to survive while living in a half-demolished mansion. While trying to steal a power core from an old Jaeger, his plan is intercepted by Amara. Amara has used stole parts to create her own, much smaller, Jaeger. Jake follows her to her hideout and tries to steal her Jaeger. They argue but are caught by the Pan Pacific Defense Corps (PPDC). Mako Mori has stepped out of the Jaegers and became the PPDC General Secretary but she is annoyed by her brother Jake’s behavior. So she gives him an option: Jail or the PPDC as an instructor. Jake chooses the PPDC. He is happy to see that Amara was recruited as well and her Jaeger named Scrapper. The PPDC was impressed that she was able to build and pilot a Jaeger on her own. Well, if you can’t beat them, hire them. While Jack is happy with Amara, he is not pleased to see Nate. And the feeling between the two is 100% mutual. Nate was once his co-pilot, but when Jake was thrown out of the program, Nate could not find someone he could drift with as well as he could with Jake. Now, these ex-co-pilots have to instruct new recruits together. If that is not bad enough Shao Corporation is introducing new Jaegers that can be remotely piloted.  While the government is happy with this idea, Mako, the recruits, and the other pilots are not.  The PPCD decides to have a council in Sydney to discuss using Shao’s technology when Jaegers go rogue and start attacking the city. When the smoke clears, Jake will have a reason to join the fight but he and everyone are shocked to learn who is behind the attack and what they really want.

The sequel to the cult phenomenon Pacific Rising, this movie separates itself while incorporating and correcting the history (FTC Affiliate Disclaimer).  You will see old and new characters while the new plot carefully weaves itself with the old plot.  While it is a strong story, you will need to see the first one to understand the second.  And while the first one was dark and grainy, this movie is shot in daylight around tall buildings so you can see the immense size and detail of the machines.  At some point, this movie looks more like an homage to Godzilla, than a sequel.  However, it allows more that one actor to be funny and concentrates on more than one relationship.  While it’s not great, it’s better than its predecessor.  And it leaves the potential for a third movie.  See this movie at the matinee and 3D is not necessary.

I give it 3 out of 5 stars

And now I am stealing for you. Circle of life – Jake

Bigger’s not so bad – Amara

Oh and try not to steal anything while you’re here – Nate

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#FistFight, #TheGreatWall, and more – Movie Reviews

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Fist Fight – Review

Fist Fight – Budget of $20 million – 1 hour and 31 minutes

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Fist Fight
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The students of Roosevelt High couldn’t care less about their school, especially on the last day. They are pulling pranks on everyone and with everything. But when they pull a prank on Mr. Strickland, the history teacher, they go a step too far. He gets furious and pulls out a fire ax, using it on a student’s desk. The student says nothing but the other teacher in the room, Mr. Campbell (the English teacher) is a different story. With a pregnant wife (who is 2 days overdue), a daughter who depends on him, and teacher cuts, Mr. Campbell wants to keep his job. So, when Principal Tyler says talk or your both fired, Mr. Campbell rats out Mr. Strickland. Mr. Strickland loses his job and blames Mr. Campbell. He decides to have a fist fight and hurt Mr. Campbell for losing his job. Afraid, Mr. Campbell tries to get security, the police, a Mac Book Pro, and meth, to stop the fight that is trending #TeacherFight

A lot of sex jokes, drug jokes, a Big Sean song, and a fight are a good mix. The flat humor of Ice Cube plays well for Mr. Strickland. And the montage of his legend feels like a recap of his music videos. This is the same debauchery we have seen in 21 Jump Street, but it’s still fun. Now, it was shocking to see the fight really happen … and it was a pretty cool fight. But they gave a reason for it and stood up for teachers. That made the movie fun. So if you want some mindless fun, this is the movie to see, but see it at matinee price. And remember the movie takes place within 1 school day.

I give it 3 out of 5 stars

This is gonna be a bad day – Mr. Campbell

Losing here is a tradition – Coach Freddie Coward

Remember, teachers stick together – Mr. Strickland

And get the Apple Care – Neil

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The Great Wall – Review

The Great Wall – Budget of $150 million – 1 hour and 44 minutes

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The Great Wall
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William and Pero are searching to find the mythical black powder. They have heard that this substance can turn air into fire. During their 6 month search, they lost 20 men and are being chased by bandits. Along with 2 other men, they find refuge in a cave. Out of nowhere an animal attacks. William cuts off one of the limbs, but can’t identify the animal. William and Pero decide to find someone who can. While on the search, they are chased by bandits, but are stopped by a circle of arrows at the Great Wall. They know the bandits will kill them, so they take their chances with the Nameless Order. The Nameless Order knows the animal as the Taoties. Every 60 years, the Taoties swarm and kill everything in their path to feed their queen. The wall was build to slow them down in the hopes of killing them and protecting the world. In order to protect their secret, the Commanders decide to let William and Pero live but never let them leave. William and Pero learn the Nameless Order have black powder and make a plan to escape with it. Until, that is, they see the Nameless Order fight the Taoties in order to save the world. William decides to stay by their side and fight.

While there are many legends about the Great Wall, this movie displays one of them. This is the typical “bad guy goes good for a cause movie”, so nothing new there. It does have some deadpan humor and wonderful costumes, but that’s not enough to carry an entire movie. You leave this film with the sense that something was missing. Even with the CGI monsters and decent CGI fight scenes, this movie was just OK. Nothing really memorable. Wait for RedBox. However if you see it in the theaters, don’t waste money on 3D or IMAX. It’s a complete waste. And be prepared to read the subtitles.

I give it 2.5 out of 5 stars

What God made those things – Pero

Whether or not the cable is attached, that is the question – Commander Lin

Follow my lead. We will be fine – William

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A Cure For Wellness – Review

A Cure For Wellness – Budget of $40 million – 2 hours and 26 minutes

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A Cure For Wellness
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Lockhart, has gotten a promotion with a corner office, so when he is asked to meet with the board, he is excited. The board, on the other hand, is not. The point out that they have spotted his mistakes and the SEC wants to ask questions. Lockhart knows the SEC doesn’t care about the small fish, they want the CEO, Roland Pembroke. During Pembroke’s vacation at a wellness spa in the Swiss Alps, he wrote the board a letter saying he was never coming back; and that’s not ok with the board. The board wants Lockhart to bring Pembroke back NOW! Once Lockhart gets to the spa, he has come back the next day because he missed visiting hours (by 15 minutes). A pissed off Lockhart leaves, but gets into an car accident on his way to the hotel. He wakes up in the spa with a broken leg. The director, Dr. Heinreich Volmer, tells him it’s best to stay so they can help him get better. He agrees and signs the papers to get treatment. However while at the spa, Lockhart learns the history of the grounds and its owners. He gets more suspicious of the doctor, Hannah (the youngest patient), the sickness, and the cure.

This movie feels like a homage to all suspense movies. With long creepy hallways, rooms without doors, creepy dentist, zombie-like staff, and a mystery liquid, you never know which way is up. There are 3 mysteries to figure out while watching this film. First, where is Roland? Second, what is the cure? Third, what happened to the brother and sister who lived on the property centuries ago. By the end, all will be revealed. However, with so many homages, this film is a bit bloated. Solving so many mysteries can cause the watcher gets lost and confused. The film should have spent 15 minutes in the beginning, giving a glimpse into to the past. This film may not become a blockbuster, but it will become a cult classic with many theories to come. And just a warning, there are somethings in this movie you will never be able to un-see. If you have a strong stomach, see it matinee price.

I give it 3 out of 5 stars

How could I? You know how I like my coffee – Lockhart

Believe me. You are in good hands – Dr. Heinreich Volmer

I am not well – Roland Pembroke

No one leaves – Hannah

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