Mila Kunis

#SpyWhoDumpedMe and #TheDarkestMinds – Movie Reviews

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The Spy Who Dumped Me – Review

The Spy Who Dumped Me – Budget of $40 million – 1 hour and 57 minutes

The Spy Who Dumped Me

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Audrey has 2 highlights in her life.  Her best friend Morgan and her favorite arcade game.  She looks to both of them because her boyfriend Drew broke up with her in a text message.  And to make matters worse, he won’t text back to get his stuff.  So, Morgan grabs her phone and text Drew.  She texts him that she will be setting is stuff ablaze.  Drew calls Audrey back and begs her to stop burning his things.  While at work, Audrey is approached by Sebastian, who asks her to walk him to his car.  She agrees to be nice but he pushes her into a van.  They explain that Drew is CIA and they need her help to find him.  She promises to keep in touch and gets out of the van.   The next day, Morgan is having fun with her latest conquest and Audrey is getting ready for work when Drew comes through their window.  He tells Audrey to hold on to his trophy.  And if he doesn’t make it, she must meet Verne in Cafe S in Vienna at 11 am tomorrow and give Verne is 2nd place fantasy football trophy.  If she doesn’t do it, a lot of people will die.  Seconds later, Drew is killed.  With a slight nudge, Morgan convinces Audrey to keep her promise and finish Drew’s mission.

With an out-of-the-world plot, this movie is funnier and more action pack than the trailer would allow you to believe.  And no, you haven’t seen the best parts in the trailers.  This will make you laugh out loud and cringe.  Also, you will do both at the same time.  It provides a lot of intricate twist in the plot but it isn’t anything new.  You can see the big reveal coming.  The biggest joy of this movie is seeing the two main characters ab-lib the funniest dialogue.  They constantly feeding off each other, upping the ante each time.  While it does have a love story, the sisterhood story between Audrey and Morgan is much stronger.  See this one matinee and bring your best friend.

I give it 3 out of 5 stars

I’m normal – Audrey

I have so much respect for you that it full circled to objectifying – Morgan

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The Darkest Minds – Review

The Darkest Minds – Budget of $34 million – 1 hour and 45 minutes

THE DARKEST MINDS

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On a typical school day, Ruby sat with her friends at lunch, laughed, and talked.  Then, her friend dropped dead in front of her.  By the end of the month, half of her class was dead.  Soon, 98% of the children in the US would die of IAAN (Idiopathic Adolescent Acute Neurodegeneration).  The remaining children would be left with powers.  The government has asked all the parents to turn their children over to be cured.  President Gray was able to cure his son, so he believes all the children can be cured.  Ruby knows her parents are worried about her being taken away.  So, on her birthday night, she tiptoes into their bedroom and promises she won’t let anyone else take her away from them.  When she touches her mother’s arm, she gets the first sense of her powers by erasing her parent’s memory of her.  The next morning Ruby’s mother doesn’t recognize her and calls the government to take her.  The government takes her to a concentration camp where the kids are separated by their “Danger Level” color.  Greens are the smartest.  Blues can move objects with their minds.  Golds can control electricity.  These are the safest colors.  Oranges and Reds are the most dangerous and should be killed on sight.  Ruby takes the test and she is an orange.  But before she can be killed, she touches the doctor and changes his mind.  The doctor makes her diagnosis a Green.  This camp will be her home for the next 6 years.  Until Ruby is discovered as an Orange and must escape.  With the help of Dr. Cate Connor, Ruby gets out of the camp.  However, when Cate makes a stop to meet up with her partner Rob with the Children’s League, Ruby gets a bad vibe from touching him and runs off.  She hides in Liam (Blue) and Chubs (Green) van with the help of Zu (Gold).  They are looking for a rumored oasis for kids like them.  They believe they will finally be safe there.

Based on The Darkest Minds series by Alexandra Bracken, this movie is The Fifth Wave meets X-Men (FTC Affiliate Disclaimer).  With bounty hunters, doctors, and even their parents turning on them, it’s hard to understand who to trust.  Now fans of the book series, understand this movie won’t fall in line perfectly but it’s still a good movie.  This movie ends on a cliffhanger because it’s the set up for the next movie.   So don’t be surprised if you feel like the movie didn’t have a true ending.  While the major plotline and the subplot aren’t original, it provides some laughs and heartfelt moments.  This is a great matinee for teens over the summer.  However, everyone else can wait for Redbox.

I give it 2.5 out of 5 stars

I kinda like myself the way I am – Ruby

What did I tell you about picking up strays – Liam

It’s Charles to you – Chubs

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#ThorRagnarok and #BadMomsXmas – Movie Reviews

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Thor: Ragnarok – Review

Thor: Ragnarok – Budget of $180 million – 2 hours and 10 minutes

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Thor: Ragnarok
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Thor has been working to stop the prophecy of the Asgard’s demise called Ragnarok.  However, when he gets home, he learns that the 9 realms are falling apart.  Thor knows his father would never let that happen, so he confronts him and exposes that it is Loki.  Thor demands to be taken to their father.  Oden lets his sons know that Hela is on her way.  She is the Goddess of Death, bent on revenge, and their sister.  As the oldest, Hela feels she is the rightful heir to the throne.  She despises Oden for changing his way and locking her away.  While absorbing the news of a new found sister, Thor and Loki stand before her.  During the fight, Loki calls for Heimdall.  But all three are swept up in the Bitfröst Bridge while still fighting.  Hela throws Loki and Thor out; she heads to Asgard to rule while the brothers land on the planet Sakaar.  Hela sets her sights on taking over all the realms and by destroying everything in her path.  Her only obstacle: someone stole the Bitfröst Sword.  She must find it to continue her domination.

Thor, without his hammer, is confronted by Sakaar locals.  But soon Scrapper 142 finds him and marks him as a contender.  Thor is set to be in the Grand Master’s game and face the Grand Master’s Champion.  Thor worries that without his hammer, he will fail.  But he will learn the truth about Scrapper 142, the Grand Master’s Champion, Loki’s whereabouts, Hela’s power, Ragnarok, and what it truly means to be the God of Thunder.

Be prepared to laugh and be in awe.  When there isn’t a physical battle, you are given a verbal battle.  Sakaar is given its own color palette which completely separates it from Asgard.  New characters are introduced with clear and concise backstories which allows them to shine with their own personalities.  Since this movie is one of the funniest in the Marvel series, the humor causes the special effects to be more cartoonish than realistic.  So, the Hulk looks like a cartoon next to a real object.  At times it just doesn’t blend.  Don’t worry, you will get the joy of cameos from Stan Lee and Dr. Strange.  As well as post end credit scenes.  So see this movie at full price and IMAX, before someone tells to much.  3D is not necessary

I give it 4.5 out of 5 stars

Please don’t cut my hair – Thor

I’m just a janitor – Skurge

I have been falling for 30 minutes – Loki

Let’s call it a tie – Grandmaster

I see you. But you are far away – Heimdall

Thor, I think I’m freaking out – Bruce Banner

Many apologies your highness – Valkyrie

Now you look just like father – Hela

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A Bad Moms Christmas – Review

A Bad Moms Christmas – Budget of $28 million – 1 hour and 44 minute(s)

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A Bad Moms Christmas
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Amy sits in a destroyed house, in tears.  She has ruined Christmas for her children.  She sits and wonders where it all went wrong.  She thinks back to a few days prior when she got a text that froze her in place.  Her parents Ruth and Hank were coming for Christmas.  Ruth is extremely critical of Amy as a mom.  So when Amy tells Ruth she wants a laid back Christmas, Ruth takes over, decorates, coordinates, and congregates.  To get away from it all, Amy goes to see her friends Carla and KiKi.   Kiki’s mother Sandy came to town early.  She has no boundaries when it comes to Kiki.  Sandy says KiKi is her best friend and wants to spend every moment with her.  KiKi is horrified.  Carla’s mother Isis blew into town on a truck.  Isis is a hands-off mother with a gambling problem.  Carla is glad to see Isis but she knows Isis will ask for money and leave town.  Carla, KiKi, and Amy are stressed out with decorating, shopping, and wrapping to create the perfect Christmas.  But with their mother’s in town, they decide to take Christmas back and have fun.

A sequel to Bad Moms may have not been expected but fun for the holiday season.  While the holidays are fun, they are extremely stressful.  It’s fun to watch these ladies take over and be bad.  While each cast member holds their own, Christine Baranski takes over whenever she is on the screen.  Her ability to be the very definition of poised while ripping her daughter to shreds is amazing.  You will either laugh or have your jaw on the floor each time she speaks.  With a stripper, a smooth jazz legend, and tough game of dodgeball, this is a fun movie for adults.  Also no need to stay past the 1st end credits.  See this at the matinee price as an escape from the typical holiday movie.

I give it 2.5 out of 5 stars

I have cancer – Sandy

You, Betty White. You intrigue me. Come with me – Carla

Take the bags upstairs. Gracias – Ruth

You played that game 7 times – Lori

What’s wrong with her – KiKi

Are those really partridges – Amy

It’s Isis. Like the terrorist group – Isis

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#BadMoms – Review

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Bad Moms – Budget of $20 million – 1 hour 41 minutes

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Bad Moms
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Amy, married mother of two, is trying to keep a smile on her face while balancing life and work. But when the PTA President, Gwendolyn, goes too far with a Bake Sale Police Unit, Amy has had enough. She, along with Kiki (a stay-at-home mom) and Carla (a single mom) decide that being perfect is just too much and they will be Bad Moms. They will blow off PTA meetings, give their kids fast food, and party all night long. This change is not welcome by Gwendolyn or her friends, Stacy and Vicky (the perfect moms). They try to sabotage Amy’s movement by going after Amy’s daughter and her soccer dreams. That’s Amy’s last straw. She decided to compete for PTA president and take Gwendolyn down.

This is just a fun movie. To the guys, there are plenty of raunchy jokes for you to enjoy and not all the dads are bad. This movie isn’t a new concept but it’s still fun to watch and it squeezes in message to all types of moms. There is no way you should take your child to see this movie, but get some friends and sneak in some wine. You will laugh out loud and easily relate to one or more characters in the movie. During the credits, you get a glimpse of the actresses, their childhoods, and their moms. This movie is a definite matinee and possible full price.

I give this 3.5 out of 5 stars

The history channel was right. I guess you are the greatest generation – Dale

So uncool – Mike

Nope … that was nothing – Amy

She knows my name. I feel like Beyonce – KiKi

Everything that comes out of your mouth is a cry for help – Carla

Well damn – Stacy

You are not a slow learner. You’re entitled – Amy

I think I got pregnant – Jessie

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