Gabriel Iglesias

#BookClub and #ShowDogsMovie – Movie Reviews

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Table of Reviews

Book Club – Review

Book Club – Budget of $10 million – 1 hour and 44 minutes

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Book Club
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In 1974, Vivian started a book club with her 3 friends.  Now, Vivian, Diane, Carol, and Sharon meet once a month to discuss a book, drink wine, and connect.  Vivian is a smart risk manager who believes love is for suckers and men should be used for pleasure only.  Diane is a widow who’s daughters are treating like a little, old woman.  Sharon is a divorced judge who’s ex-husband and son are recently engaged but she is reserved about dating.  Carol is a married woman whose marriage has lost its spark.   Since it’s Vivian book choice this month, she chooses Fifty Shades of Grey.  The other women are uneasy about the choice but read the book anyway.  The next month they all have an awakening and want to experience the romance and passion of Anastasia and Christian Grey.  Vivian starts to let her ex-boyfriend/failed fiance into her life.  Diane tries to cut the cord with her daughters when she meets a handsome pilot.  Sharon puts herself on Bumble (FTC Affiliate Disclaimer).  And Carol tries to get the spark back in her marriage with some medical help.  These women will find their voice in one book at a time.

While this movie mentions the Fifty Shades Trilogy, it’s not just about the women reading the book (FTC Affiliate Disclaimer).  It’s about them discovering who they are and what the want but they don’t understand what is truly getting in their way.  The book club is the catalyst of their friendship while forcing them to take a hard look into their lives.  They come to the conclusion that age shouldn’t dictate their love or sex lives.  They can still be strong and have romance.  The only obstacle stopping them is themselves.  You will find yourselves rooting for and laughing with each woman in this movie.  See this one at the matinee price. Also, it helps to have read the books first.

I give it 3 out of 5 stars

Sorry if that sounds judgemental. Hazard of the job – Sharon

Multiple ear-gasms. Who wouldn’t want that – Carol

It says right here, for mature audiences only. That sounds like us – Diane

I don’t need anyone. That’s the secret to my success – Vivian

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Show Dogs – Review

Show Dogs – Budget Unknown – 1 hour and 30 minutes

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show-dogs-movie-trailer-2018-will-arnett-ludacris
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Max is a tough K9 in the New York Police department. He investigates crimes on is own because he doesn’t do the master/dog thing.  During a sting operation to rescue a smuggled panda, Max’s bust is scooped by FBI Agent Frank.  Angry that Frank is getting credit for his case, Max takes a bite out of Frank.  However, when the perp tells him the smuggler will be at the Dog Show in order to sale the panda, Max gets an idea.  Frank and Max will work together to enter into the dog show and stay close to the case.  But Max must follow commands to stay in the competition.  If he doesn’t, they will lose access to the dog show.  As the investigation progresses, Max and Frank discover that the panda isn’t the only victim for this smuggler.

This light-hearted comedy gives a nod to Turner & Hooch and Dirty Dancing will remaining true to itself (FTC Affiliate Disclaimer).  It follows the recipe for buddy cop movie (i.e. 2 different partners coming together to solve a crime but growing up and breaking their shell in the process).  This movie is for kids with slapstick humor but adults will laugh alike.  And while it is about animal smuggling the message isn’t shoved down the viewers’ throat.  So if you want a good family movie, see this one at the matinee price.

I give it 2.5 out of 5 stars

Future me forgives past you for present us – Karma

Someone otta put a leash on you – Frank

Do you want one fluffed or folded because I have both in the back – Mattie

I can not polish a turd but perhaps I can roll it in glitter – Philippe

How did you get to be such an alpha – Sprinkles

Is it me or do they all look alike – Max

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#AtomicBlonde, #TheNutJob2, and #WindRiver- Review Repost – In Stores Now!!!

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Table of Reviews

Atomic Blonde – Review

Atomic Blonde – Budget of $30 million – 1 hour and 55 minutes

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Atomic Blonde
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Ten days before the Berlin Wall falls, Lorraine is given her mission. The night before an agent named James was killed and a watch containing a list was taken from him.  She must find the list (on microfilm) which contains the name of all the current spies in the field. It must be recovered soon because one spy is listed as a double agent. They need the list to save every operative in the field and to stop the double agent. Her point of contact in Berlin is David.  But Lorraine is worried because the moment she lands in Berlin, she is made by the KGB and must fight.  She is quickly discovered by David who gives her the 10 cent tour of Berlin.  David is quick to exchange anything for information.  Now Lorraine recalls the events of the past 10 days with her boss in an interrogation room.  By the end, her story will include a man with a photographic memory, a beautiful French operative, an ice pick, and a corkscrew.

Based on The Coldest City by Anthony Johnston, this thrill ride starts at the very beginning (FTC Affiliate Disclaimer).  It has the right dose of kick-butt action with dashes of humor when needed.  As Lorraine discusses not having the right outfit before a battle or comment on her contact’s balls, it makes for an easy laugh in tense situations.  Some of the fight scenes are a spectacle to see because everything is a weapon.  There is a not sweeping shot of the fight scenes, just up close and personal.  This is purposely done to make the audience feeling each punch, kick, stab, and gunshot.  Also, the hand to hand combat makes things seem more realistic.  This is a fun watch for any action fan.  Be warned that all of Lorraine’s fights are in the trailer but not at full scale.  Are the best parts of the fight scenes in the trailer? NO.  However, you will anticipate them as the scenes play out.  Anyone younger than 16 should stay home and no need to stay past the credits.  There could be a part two but we must see how this movie pans out with audiences.  See it with the understanding that you may need to see it twice.  It goes fast and there are a lot of twists and turns.

I give it 4 out of 5 stars

Your not the best, are you? – James

Would it make you more comfortable if I stood on the other side of that mirror? It’s a bit crowded back there. – CIA Agent

Money is good. Information is better – David

Sorry. It looked like you needed saving – Delphine

Well, shall we began – Lorraine

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The Nut Job 2: Nutty By Nature – Review

The Nut Job 2: Nutty By Nature – Budget Unknown – 1 hour and 31 minutes

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The Nut Job 2: Nutty By Nature
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Surly and the other animals are enjoying the high life at the old Nut Shop.  Since it closed, they have taken over and stop scrounging for nuts in the forest.  Now it’s a 24-hour party.  Andy, however, thinks they are becoming lazy, fat, and entitled.  They are losing their animal instincts.  She tries to teach the younger children but it’s falling on deaf ears.  Surly doesn’t see why Andy worries so much until the Nut Shop explodes.  The animals don’t know what to do for food and they don’t want to scrounge for it.  Surly and Buddy try to find a new Nut Shop but fail.  Andy tells them they must learn their old ways in Liberty Park.  However, Andy doesn’t know that Mayor Muldoon is upset about Liberty Park.  It is the only place in this town that doesn’t earn him any money.  So, he wants to get rid of it and create an amusement park.  As his bulldozers rip apart the park, the animals try to stop them.  The Mayor calls Critter Catchers to trap them.  Surly is caught in a trap and is freed with Precious’s help.  But soon, Precious is taken by Heather Muldoon, the mayor’s daughter.  Buddy and Surly go to rescue Precious from Heather.  While Andy tries to find a new place to live and go back to nature.

The sequel to The Nut Job is just a fun movie (FTC Affiliate Disclaimer).  Animals are becoming lazy because they don’t have to work anymore.  Everything is given to them.  So they lose their need to fight and survive.  Once the handouts are gone, they don’t know what to do.  They wait for Surly to give all the answers.  Getting back to basics is the best for these animals.  This is a great lesson for kids to learn.  They should get strong and not settle for an easy path but learn to fight and survive.  Once they learn, they must keep fighting and growing.  Also, kids learn that money isn’t everything and animal need a home too.  While golf and amusement parks are nice, parks and recreation are just as good.  Kids will enjoy this film and adults will get some laughs, too.  This is a wholesome movie for all with plenty of lessons thrown it.  And pay attention to the Mayor’s license plate.  It tells all you need to know about him.  See it in theaters but no need for 3D.

I give it 4 out of 5 stars

If you are lucky, they give you a nut. If you are unlucky, they are nuts – Surly

See class, hard work pays off – Andy

Ha. Now we both have smooshed faces – Precious

Daddy, I can do it. I love to shoot helpless, defenseless animals – Heather

I’m Frankie. That’s short for Frank – Frank

If you ever come back to the city, you’re dead – Mr. Fang

The best thing about being Mayor, I get to sign my own permits – Mayor Muldoon

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Wind River – Review

Wind River – Budget of $11 million – 1 hour and 51 minutes

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Wind River
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Near to the town of Lander, there is Wind River Reservation.  They have had an issue with mountain lions killing the local livestock, so they call in U.S. Fish and Wildlife officer Cory Lambert.  It’s his job to hunt big animals and keep the town and reservation safe.  While tracking the family of lions, he comes across the dead body of Natalie Hanson.  She was barefoot, beaten, and raped.  Cory can see that her footprints are in the snow and she has frostbite on her feet and face.  He calls the murder into the Tribal police, who call the FBI.  Cory meets with Jane, the FBI agent, who realizes that his knowledge of the area will help her in the investigation.  She asks him to help her hunt for a killer.  Her biggest obstacle is the medical examiner.  He doesn’t want to list Natalie’s death as a murder because she died because of the exposure to the cold, not her injuries.  Jane and Cory are furious.  They know she was running from her attackers and that caused her to freeze and die.  Now Jane has to investigate without any other agents on her side.  Just the Trible Police and Cory.  While Jane hunts for a killer’s motive find him, Cory hunts for a killer’s trail to find him.  But during the investigation, Jane learns this hunt is personal for Cory.  Natalie was his daughter’s best friend and his daughter Emily was a murder victim too.  Solving this crime will not bring his daughter back, but it will bring the closure to a family that he was never given.

Inspired by several events among Native women, this is a heart-wrenching tale of crime, grief, and loss.  This movie completely contradicts with the picturesque landscapes, open land, and magnificent snow.  You learn that while the land is beautiful, it masks a horrible legacy of rape, drug abuse, and murder.  As Cory tells Jane how the victim died, you will feel the theater get colder and your chest tighten.  You will wonder how long you could survive given the circumstances.  This movie is different because you just don’t hear the crime, you see it first hand.  Also, you will see the effect her death has on her family but comes to no shock to the reservation.  And just as you find peace with the ending, you learn a horrible statistic.  The number of missing Native Women is not a tracked statistic.  No one knows for sure how many are missing.  Hopefully, this film will spark a change.

I give it 4.5 out of 5 stars

What’s the rule, son? Guns are always loaded, even when they ain’t – Cory

Why is it when you people say you want to help, it starts with an insult – Martin

Please don’t make me laugh – Jane

It’s not good – Ben

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#HitmansBodyguard and #TheNutJob2 – Movie Reviews

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Table of Reviews

The Hitman’s Bodyguard – Review

The Hitman’s Bodyguard – Budget Unknown – 1 hour and 58 minutes

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The Hitman's Bodyguard
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Michael Bryce was working for Triple-A Protection Services and giving his clients top notch treatment.  Until his client was murdered after boarding a plane.  Two years later Michael has not recovered from losing his client.  He is still a bodyguard but for low-end players.  Darius Kincaid has offered his testimony against a murderous tyrant for his wife Sonia’s freedom.  He doesn’t care that he will spend the rest of his life in jail because he only wants her to be free.  Interpol knows that anyone who was scheduled to testify against the tyrant Vladislav Dukhovich dies before they take the stand.  So, they decided to protect him every step of the way.   Amelia Ryder is in charge of the Interpol Protection detail.  Once they head to the courthouse, it all hits the fan,  After multiple bullets, Amelia and Darius are on the run to her safe house.  Darius warns her that Interpol must have a leak and she needs to call someone she can trust to help her that’s outside of Interpol.  She only knows one person that can handle Darius and that’s Michael Bryce.  Once Michael learns he must protect Darius (who attempted to kill him 29) he says no.  But Amelia promises Michael she will get him his status back in the protection business.  Michael has to keep Darius alive but he (and Duhkovich’s men) want to kill him every step of the way.  If Michael doesn’t get Darius to the court on time and alive a Dukhovich will be free.

What if Pulp Fiction’s Jules met Deadpool (FTC Affiliate Disclaimer)? Well, you don’t have to wonder anymore.  This movie is your answer.  With quick-witted banter, 2 crazy “how we met” stories, plenty of fights, and a plethora of car chases, this is a fun shoot-em-up movie.  While the plotline is nothing new nor the characters, it’s still fun.  It’s the comedic timing of Reynolds & Jackson that make this movie worth watching.  Seeing Reynolds do his best Jackson impression is great.  When the action slows down, the dialog picks up and vice versa.  Now the storyline between Michael and Amelia is boring, the storyline between Darius and Sonia will compete with Harley Quinn and Joker.  They may just be the movie couple of the year.   See this one in the movies and see it until the very end of the “director’s cut”.

I give it 3.5 out of 5 stars

You are as useful as a condom in a convent – Darius

Let’s just focus on you “dying of natural causes”, shall we? – Michael

Like I said, there is nothing more important than a good education – Dukhovich

Did I say you could look around – Sonia

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The Nut Job 2: Nutty By Nature – Review

The Nut Job 2: Nutty By Nature – Budget Unknown – 1 hour and 31 minutes

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The Nut Job 2: Nutty By Nature
Click on a vendor to purchase: Amazon, Best Buy, iTunes, Target, Vudu (Digital Exclusive), and Walmart (Exclusive Set) (FTC Affiliate Disclaimer)

Surly and the other animals are enjoying the high life at the old Nut Shop.  Since it closed, they have taken over and stop scrounging for nuts in the forest.  Now it’s a 24-hour party.  Andy, however, thinks they are becoming lazy, fat, and entitled.  They are losing their animal instincts.  She tries to teach the younger children but it’s falling on deaf ears.  Surly doesn’t see why Andy worries so much until the Nut Shop explodes.  The animals don’t know what to do for food and they don’t want to scrounge for it.  Surly and Buddy try to find a new Nut Shop but fail.  Andy tells them they must learn their old ways in Liberty Park.  However, Andy doesn’t know that Mayor Muldoon is upset about Liberty Park.  It is the only place in this town that doesn’t earn him any money.  So, he wants to get rid of it and create an amusement park.  As his bulldozers rip apart the park, the animals try to stop them.  The Mayor calls Critter Catchers to trap them.  Surly is caught in a trap and is freed with Precious’s help.  But soon, Precious is taken by Heather Muldoon, the mayor’s daughter.  Buddy and Surly go to rescue Precious from Heather.  While Andy tries to find a new place to live and go back to nature.

The sequel to The Nut Job is just a fun movie (FTC Affiliate Disclaimer).  Animals are becoming lazy because they don’t have to work anymore.  Everything is given to them.  So they lose their need to fight and survive.  Once the handouts are gone, they don’t know what to do.  They wait for Surly to give all the answers.  Getting back to basics is the best for these animals.  This is a great lesson for kids to learn.  They should get strong and not settle for an easy path but learn to fight and survive.  Once they learn, they must keep fighting and growing.  Also, kids learn that money isn’t everything and animal need a home too.  While golf and amusement parks are nice, parks and recreation are just as good.  Kids will enjoy this film and adults will get some laughs, too.  This is a wholesome movie for all with plenty of lessons thrown it.  And pay attention to the Mayor’s license plate.  It tells all you need to know about him.  See it in theaters but no need for 3D.

I give it 4 out of 5 stars

If you are lucky, they give you a nut. If you are unlucky, they are nuts – Surly

See class, hard work pays off – Andy

Ha. Now we both have smooshed faces – Precious

Daddy, I can do it. I love to shoot helpless, defenseless animals – Heather

I’m Frankie. That’s short for Frank – Frank

If you ever come back to the city, you’re dead – Mr. Fang

The best thing about being Mayor, I get to sign my own permits – Mayor Muldoon

Click on a vendor to purchase: Amazon, Best Buy, iTunes, Target, Vudu (Digital Exclusive), and Walmart (Exclusive Set) (FTC Affiliate Disclaimer)

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